imtiredandeverythinghurts by Hats Off Gentlemen It's Adequate

This song is about the experience of wanting to be honest when asked how I (Malcolm) am, while also being aware that in many social situations it isn't the done thing to actually say how you feel. This is a frequent problem for someone with an invisible disability that causes chronic pain (I has Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome).

Malcolm explains -
"Ehlers-Danlos syndrome is a group of genetic disorders affecting collagen, the major structural protein in the body. For me personally, it causes spinal problems, recurrent vomiting, chronic pain, intermittent brain fog, problems with the autonomic nervous system and peripheral nerves, and unpredictable pains in almost any joint. It is also for me an invisible disability, as although my life is greatly overshadowed by chronic pain, leading to me having to retire from my career as a consultant neuropathologist (hospital doctor), to most people most of the time I'm not visibly disabled."

The song was inspired by a Newsthump T-shirt (title used with permission of Newsthump).

This song will be on the album 'The Light Of Ancient Mistakes', to be released on 9 September 2023. Sales on Bandcamp of the single release this year will be donated to The Ehlers-Danlos Society to help with their work in research relating to Ehlers-Danlos syndrome.

Tracklist

1.	imtiredandeverythinghurts	2:43

Lyrics

“How are you”, well I’m meant to answer
It’s not like I’m trying to drag you down
But I don’t like dishonesty
And I can see that I’m veering off script now

I hate the question though it’s well intentioned
If it’s just a turn phrase, please can I pass?
Let’s skip from hello to the content
And save us both an awkward moment

I keep on, but it’s just momentum
I keep going as I know if I slow I might stop
I don’t want to give up, I don’t want to give in
But I’m scared
So let’s not go there

I keep smiling
So you might not notice
That I’m falling apart
I’m close to an edge
I need help
If this time you’re really asking
I’m tired and everything hurts

And there are times when I feel less broken
I feel like a fake, a fraudulent spokesman
Wearing a badge I look like I’ve stolen
So I push myself

My mistake, well what a surprise
I’ve done it again
I’ve pushed myself too far
And each time I tell myself
That I’ve learned to ask for help
Well I haven’t

I keep on, but it’s just momentum
I keep going as I know if I slow I might stop
I don’t want to give up, I don’t want to give in
But I’m scared
So let’s not go there

I keep smiling
So you might not notice
That I’m falling apart
I’m close to an edge
I need help
If this time you’re really asking
I’m tired and everything hurts

Credits

released July 26, 2023
Performed by Malcolm Galloway, Mark Gatland

Malcolm Galloway - vocals, lead guitar, additional guitars, keyboards/synths, programming

Mark Gatland - bass guitar, additional guitars, keyboards/synths

Music by Malcolm Galloway and Mark Gatland
Lyrics by Malcolm Galloway
Producer - Malcolm Galloway
Co-producer - Mark Gatland
Mixed and mastered by Malcolm Galloway with Mark Gatland
Copyright Malcolm Galloway, Mark Gatland, Hats Off Gentlemen It's Adequate, Glass Castle Recordings 2023

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