Whale Tale from UNDERGROUND BUNKUM by Gregorstan Wolforfox & The Dog Pack
Whale Tale tells a true story in which human existence is impacted by animal non-existence. It is a folk ballad recounting the sudden detonation of half-digested fish inside a whale that actually beached itself on a Taiwan shoreline in 2004. The fermented fish propelled itself through the outer layers of the whale, while villagers, shoppers, and tourists looked on helplessly. The local scientists reconstructed the whale, and determined that this detonation could be made to happen twice.
By all means, do not try this experiment on your own.
The song is bubbling with high energy in a folk-rock style. It adheres loosely to a verse and chorus alternation, with the verses and choruses continually subjected to subtle variation calculated to build the dramatic intensity. The chorus repeats drive home to emphasize and re-emphasize the uniqueness of the event – the likes of which the villagers would most prefer to forget, although they never will. So here, with Whale Tale, we bring it to the rest of the world as well…
Tracklist
| 9. | Whale Tale | 5:18 |
Videos
Lyrics
WHALE TALE
Come gather round the fireside for a bedtime tale or two
This story is too depressing, revolting and pointless to pester you
I could never have thought it, it’s unfortunately true
It was a pleasant spring morn in a Korean coastal town
The sun came up and the moon went down
The villagers and tourists were frenetically shopping
The cash registers were revenue popping
A festive scene with everyone bopping
The fishermen had caught a big gray whale
They were taking it to market in a flat bed truck
They were contemplating payday with a pint of ale
When for no apparent reason, the whale blew up
The whale blew up! The whale blew up! It could not contain its contents
The whale blew up on a flat bed truck when it was fed up with all the nonsense
It stuck to the pavement, it splashed into shops
It darkened the sky, it dusted the crops
It rose to the rooftops and dripped off like raindrops
It pelted the people and got on their laptops
Cleaning it up was the worst job in history
Having to do it made them want to solve the mystery
So they brought the scraps to the beach where they could reconstruct the whale
And they figured out it started from deep inside the whale’s entrails
From its last meal before it bit the fishermen’s bait
And sure enough the menu of fish on that whale’s plate
If left out in the spring air long enough to stagnate
Turn into compounds that are bound to detonate
And what happened perfectly matched what the experts foretold
from combustion of fermented fish propelled into the road
The whale blew up! The whale blew up! Somewhere out there there’s an orphan pup
The whale blew up on a flat bed track, if you care you can put a quarter in its cup
Now we know if you can a whale get it put on ice
Now we have the knowledge to make it not happen twice
But the people that day would say it came at way too high a price
No one who was there that day will ever get it out of their mind
No one will ever know what was left behind
If this had happened across the sea
The people who got splashed could claim PTSD
Retire on disability
And get their drugs delivered for free!
(Chorus)
Credits
Composed by M.J. Berger
Performed by Gregorstan Wolforfox & The Dog Pack
License
All rights reserved.
The star of Underground Bunkum, lead singer Gregorstan Wolforfox, was born in obscurity. Where? He’s not sure – that’s why it is in obscurity! A meteoric rise, a precipitous fall, a rise from the ashes, and now this – UNDERGROUND BUNKUM front and center on the virtual stage.