Moonsense / 月感 by Fishdoll

音樂人對自己誠實的方法，是對作品誠實，一如作家起初的創作，總是圍繞著自己的故事與成長，如何在音樂裏解剖自我，再坦然地將其公諸於眾，是需要足夠勇氣和平和心態的。Fishdoll回歸自己生長的地方，打拼了兩年，經歷新階段的重重磨練，繼續與現實抗爭，重新找回對生活的信念，鑄就了這張新專輯的誠實核心。它自然而然，如開花結果，落葉歸根，它可以發生在每個人的身上，平常到似乎根本不值一提，如此一來，Fishdoll便能以輕鬆坦然的狀態將事實客觀呈現，並體會這一探索過程中收穫的對音樂的領悟。

開篇所展現出的自然意象，原始叢林般的開闊豐饒，奠定了這張新專輯樸實真誠的基調，緊接著有面對自然環境的自我呢喃；審慎的自我觀察；不懼暴露瑕疵的坦蕩和不怕散發魅力的自信；潛意識的自主生長；不進行任何人工干預的理智視角；發現自然生命力一瞬間時難以遏制的喜悅；不與潛意識對抗的順從等。這些Fishdoll想通過音樂與自然、外界和自己取得更緊密的企圖，都以一種中肯的陳述語態表達出來，不抗拒，不批判，不添油加醋，不強行解釋，這本身就是放下我執的過程，一旦與客觀事實建立起真實的連結，Fishdoll便在其中獲得了內心真正的充盈感，意識開始與潛意識互通，情緒的充沛轉化成自我能量的補充，就再也不想僅僅滿足自己的快感來製造音樂，創造力也不再被獵奇的聲音探索所牽制。

新專輯中，Fishdoll做了很多突破——第一次嘗試寫中文詞，第一次嘗試編寫管弦樂作品，她想“惡補”音樂知識，堅信就算半路出家也完全不晚，她希望永遠處於學習的過程中。因此，她再也不會介意任何一個階段的不完美，尊重生命自然屬性上的“留白”部分，並將對這部分“空白”的思考也融入創作：“每首作品的創作過程像是觀察痛苦並全然接受的過程，就像接受自己的不完美一樣，學會把執念放下。當心境豁然開朗，生命力會像朝陽一般燦爛，那些困住腳步的自我懷疑化成晨間的露水。這時你會看到生活的美。我想歌頌人間苦樂，因為生活給了我太多的禮物，我要感謝生活。我希望這些音樂能喚起人們心底的善念，善待世界，善待彼此。”

As an artist, being honest with oneself is exemplified in the consistent integrity of each individual work. It takes intrepidity and an abandonment of the ego to create with vulnerability and self-acceptance. Fishdoll’s return to her hometown ushered in a new phase of life full of challenges and confrontations with reality. Her increasing awareness of herself within this struggle, and her desire to grow and evolve despite it, are what formed the nucleus of her next album. This process of growth is natural; Such as the flowering and fruiting of a tree, followed by its leaves falling to the roots. It is ubiquitous, so much so that it seems to be not worth mentioning. Using this essentialness as a conceptual platform is what allows Fishdoll to create from a place that encourages self-acceptance, self-exploration and serenity.

We begin in a lush, ageless, flora and fauna rich forest. A contrasting blend of density and spaciousness ignites the essence of this new album. This is followed by a further acknowledgement of the environment, and Fishdoll’s internal dialogue of candid self-reflection. This leads to a reaction of open-heartedness and fearlessness; the willing exposition of flaws and a powerful confidence that entices. Then follows the autonomous strengthening of the subconscious mind. The joy of discovering the vitality of nature, that is as fleeting as it is transformative. The full acceptance of one’s consciousness, and the decrease in self-conflict.

Fishdoll’s attempts and experiences to find herself more intimately through nature and the outside world are all expressed in a voice of definitive declaration. This voice does not hesitate, embellish or criticize with forced explanation. It evokes a gradual process of releasing the ego and establishing a real connection with one’s personal truth. In this, Fishdoll gains a sense of inner fullness and enlightenment. The conscious mind then begins with the unconscious, and the wealth of emotions is transformed into a supplement of self-energy. In a broader sense, it is a realization that self-satisfaction is no longer the sole pleasure of making music, but it is rather a desire to simply share with the world.

This sophomore album presents several firsts; Fishdoll’s first foray into writing Mandarin lyrics, and her first offering of orchestral arrangement. She stands by the belief that it is never too late to learn what you feel may have already passed you; she hopes to stay in perpetual learning. Therefore, she has learned to pay no mind to imperfections, respecting emptiness as one of the essential aspects of life, and one to be respected. “When your mind suddenly becomes clear, your vitality will be as bright as the sunrise, and those trapped self-doubts will turn into morning dew. At this time you will be able to fully observe the everyday beauty of life. I want to sing the joys and sufferings of the world, because life has given me so many gifts; I want to give back. I hope these music can arouse the kindness in people's hearts, treat the world and treat each other kindly."

A cosmic offering of iridescent electro-soul. The debut from Beijing’s rising singer, songwriter, and producer, Fishdoll.

"If Gold Panda and Little Dragon's Yukimi Nagano had an illegitimate love-child, it would probably sound something like Fishdoll" - Indie Current